Things Remind Me

things remind me,
seize me suddenly
in one moment
I am blue.

one day at the bookstore,
camus,
but
especially sartre..
easy i 'get'..
but then other times..
random moments.
a book on cats,
impressionists or Mozart.
i try avoiding places
i know you'll be,
the children's floor,
a painting
behind a door..

still, yet..

someone but mentions you.
i'd want to cry, too easily.
random happy things,
sad things, crazy angry
too..(things
i'd want to tell you.)
thoughts and moments to share:
a crappy day,
a book I read..
a film about Paris.
a friend that made me
think of you..
random pears and tartes,
and violins.

questioning history
so much to share.
a spare thought
or millions..

happy-grief-bliss
passing like mist
through a foggy veil.
I get the lonelies..
then I trip
on my shoe..
my heart stops,
I know not what to do..
remembering suddenly
(even 8 years later..)
you aren't there.

oh! how i still miss you!