Saturday, April 30, 2016

Day 30: (26th Poem)

DSC_5140

love.
all stop;
exiting through,
hate leaving you!
the time ends quite quick,
time until we meet again
unknown, the interval passes.
precious want and impatience felt.




(assuming I did this right, should be accompanying number of syllables per line..)

Monday, April 25, 2016

Day 25: missed, want (what I could do)


lacyafternoon24

what i could do
with
those missed views!
the shots i
could
take.
my eyes are not
yours,
you shoot,
but
you don't shoot
like me..
the things i see!
the way the
sky
hits
ground,
the angle..
that light sound.
the way red
meets brown.
no
light
meter,
no firing flash.
no need.
let the sun
do its
work..
let the night
drip sex
and the fog smoke.
let people touch..
let light
enter
the iris
and the moment
pass..
let me look,
and let you see.
let us both
make a memory.
oh,
what i could do,
if i had that chance.
pretty
the picture
but lost the moment,
if we don't
advocate
for our own
desires.

Day 24: still the water


DSC_5863
still the water
dripping in the basin..
still the showers
pounding at the door..
silence the waves,
cool the steam,
warm the air..
let nothing move.
let nothing speak.
practical silence..
and the beating heart.
peace.

Day 24: On the very worst Days..


I say I'm sorry because I'm supposed to be..
I wasn't supposed to be here.
I should have been buried
in someone's backyard like an old bone.

I say I'm sorry because I'm supposed to be..
I should have been drowned in a tub..
or thrown down the stairs.. (that's what she did.)
or just left out in the cold to die.

I say I'm sorry because I'm supposed to..
I should have just killed myself
when I had the chance, but I didn't.
I don't want to leave a mess,
or inconvenience anyone, or put anyone out.

I say I'm sorry because I'm supposed to be..
I'm an inconvenience to the world.
People are busy and don't have time.
People have lives.. not mine.

I say I'm sorry because I'm supposed to be.
I don't express myself right & get confusing.
If I don't know an answer, that's OK..
don't bother people, they are busy.


Saturday, April 23, 2016

Day 23: To Melt. To Say I am Hooked.

I have nothing today.. so it's a reworked poem.. (because everything I write is awful..) This one from 1989.. one of a very few of my own poems I have mostly memorized..

DSC_6538



To Melt (To Say I am Hooked)

the words, they stumble
from my lips.
the words, they form..
not too quick.

i lack the art
to express myself,
to tell you how i feel.
to say i like you,
(i like you a lot!)

you do me over,
with just one look.
and i melt like butter
from head to hips
(to toe..)

i melt. to say i am hooked.




Friday, April 22, 2016

Day 22: Sensibitilty


4th Street bridge w/ rain
Sensibility

Alas: love..
when my head
catches up
with my heart.
Oh! the dam burst!
Oh! the weeping!
the despair.
Oh! the love that
can not be
shouted!
can not be shared
right now..
can not be given but
quietly.
through
silent meditation
and hope.
through kind
thoughts
and wishes.
through
silent energy
poured forth
in waves of muse..
through skies of
blue
and teary, gray-clouded,
splattering
thunder-rattling rain!
restless
night wandering..
floor pacing
contemplating
friendship
hoping,
helpful wanting to be..
of service to you.
a cup.
a hand.
a foot.
a friend..

a heart on mend.






(reworked poem)

Day 21: Today. Not Yesterday.


Disney Concert Hall

Today. Not Yesterday.

Today.
Not Yesterday.
(though
such an
amazing Person
still.)
The Person
I see
before me now,
is the one whom
in my thoughts
dwell.
The path you
travel,
makes you
who you are
now.
The many
experiences
that
shaped you,
and makes you
so fine.
the Person
I want
so much
to know..
your
every
brilliant facet!
to hold
in my hand
your beautiful
sparkle;
and always within
your presence..
You bundle of
life!

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Day 20: Deniers


i breath the history
i wear it like a cloak.
the harm you do;
the shame it coats..
like sludge
on the heart.
weighing down thick
the hurt you do
to your fellow man.
you have a stain,
that won't wash off.
you wear it like a badge.
I see it as an open wound.


Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Day 19: The Invisible

0210bikeride26

The Invisible

I must be
invisible:
a place-holder
for the real.
I haunt the places
I walk
and hope you
will see me..
I am
aware
and
definitely
can see
you.
you exist
whole
and complete
and..
You must know
you are good.
and I am
just myself.



(which isn't
so bad given a chance..
)

Day 18: Late Night Again


newview03

Late Night Again

sleep.
the world
has put a blanket
over its head..
soon
i must
but for
a short time,
then awake.
dreaming
brief.
i hope
for you..
that your
slumber
is peaceful.
and rest comes
easily to you.

Sunday, April 17, 2016

Day 17: untitled (oh, that you were mine)


McCovey Cove & @KarltheFog from section 307 View Reserve #attpark #sfgiants

oh, that you were
mine

to tell..

oh, that you were
my friend to share!


the world cracking
pain

around my heart

happy
joy
and weep-weary silence.


the
leaking!
cracking!
split!


Just to say
I love you.

be grateful

to know you.

to have release.

to know peace..

and
return in kind.

to not be afraid!

and let heart
meet mind.

to know.

for it
all to be fine.

and I am yours
in most all things..



(in time)



especially friendship.




*reworked poem

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Day 16: untitled (if I were a place..)


Market Street, SF

If I were a place
where would I be?
the place i came from
or this place I long to be?
The journey
isn't the destination,
the destination
isn't the place.
The adventures we have
build us,
travel makes us strong.

Friday, April 15, 2016

Day 15: I Could Read You Every Day


#typewriters #BDG Oct. #1916

i could read you every day,
i could learn a phrase.
i would live on air,
i would breath your fire.



Today's Prompt.. doubles or pairs.. (which I could not honestly come up with much.)

Day 14: Silence is Not a Friend


Untitled


silence is not a friend,
it's a growing hunger
and thirst.
it digs in deep..
it revels in the pain;
a seeming unending
aching for the word.


Wednesday, April 13, 2016

NaPoWriMo 2016: Day 13


Worthy of So Much

A fool for you
perhaps.
If you asked.
I would:
take a challenge,
take your word..
I would exist
on silent crusade
and sing for you.
I would learn
a new world for you.
Not for weakness,
but for love
for friendship
that is yet to form.
even if left empty
and alone,
I would do for you.
because I judge it so
worthy of so much,
and perhaps,
if I'm lucky,
I won't be a fool
but something more.


Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Day 12: The Things They Did


The Things They Did

it scars the soul,
the things they did.
but we should live
and bear witness.
and bear the pain.
share the knowing.
and never forget.



and never forget.




it scars the heart
the things they did.
but we should live
and sing our songs
and dance our dance
rejoice for the joy.
but never forget.



but never forget.

Monday, April 11, 2016

Day 11: When Lines Meet


beautiful day in Berkeley

when lines meet.
and intersect,
the wind plays
like a harp
across the sky.
reverberate
and jump
and Spring..
birds sing..
such
romantic things!

Saturday, April 9, 2016

Day 09: Rainy Saturday in Berkeley


BerkeleyHillsFog


stormy wet fog
rising over the hills.
rainy Saturday
Berkeley..
watching
from windows..
still.
fog & light,
i imagine
far across the bay..
bridges between,
safety..
pondering the day.

1120am

NaPoWriMo 2016: Day 08


I wish I could translate
the thoughts of your mind..
the way you smile,
as if sharing
your very own secret.
beauty
is something that lights
from within..
you radiate like the sun.

9 April 2015 (yes a day late)

Thursday, April 7, 2016

Day 07: Bridges, Walls and Dams

Bridges, Rock Walls and Dams


Like birds on a wire
or lemmings on a ledge,
people peer over,
as if at a hedge.
The air is floating,
like in that dream,
where base jumpers
leap into canyons,
catching an airstream.
But me, I am grounded.
A dead weight,
I would not fly;
but sink like a
blood-filled stone.
I would not die.
I would only
break a few bones,
thus.. I would never try.



Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Day 06: chocolate (food prompt)


chocolate
I love you
though we've
not always seen
eye-to-eye.
the days I wanted
for you,
you made me sick.
my wheezing
tongue-swelling
attack
called me out.
there was no
point in
sneaking you in,
when you
raise the alarm
immediately.
I'm so glad
I've gotten older,
you've acclimated
to me.
now I savor you
your meltiness,
dark or milk,
or salty caramel,
sticky sweet,
you become
one with me.
that phenylalanine
rush of good
feeling
I only get from
you
(and the occasional
lemon square.)

Today's Prompt (food poem)

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Day 05: Seed Packet Prompt (I live without a Mirror)




I live without a mirror
or an honest critic.
I live without advice.
I don't know what is
preferable but I see
what others like..

you can be assured.
but I can't say that
I am any of those things,
certainly not perky or sweet
not sinewy or ethereal,
not sparkling or desired.


but I can't say I'm too hideous,
though I've seen younger days.
I react easily when engaged,
and am solid and steadfast.
I thrive in sun and wind,
and don't mind the rain,
darkness does no harm,
but only when I'm game.


No I am not a prize winner,
certainly no rose, no flower,
though my color isn't bad.
I blush when fussed over
like anyone, and grow
in your daily ardor.
instead I work within
from deep inside,
where hearts take root;
and burn with a hidden fire.


I am good company for everyone,
and will not complain
if not offered a drink..
but like a vine I wind,
and come to life in your light.
I try to be patient and quiet
and with the right attention,
hope that's what you'll desire.






Today's Prompt (aeed packets)

Monday, April 4, 2016

Day 04: A Long Summer

a janky poem a day.. this is getting hard. I don't get inspired very often so forcing me to come up with something every day just makes it worse. Blah.. and now, the "cruelest month" prompt, (are months cruel??)


no one talks

A long Summer..

the cruelest time
is when we are away..
no exams to be had
but set adrift..
to make our own plans.
to stack up the books
or binge on films,
or hike up the hills!
or hunker down..
ponder death..
take a long trip
or a sleep in the sun.
clear out the gutter,
re-layer some paint..
find a hobby or
just contemplate.
don't waste time
but get things done..



today's prompt.. "the cruelest month"

Sunday, April 3, 2016

Day 03: Creepy Fan Poem


I

oh I adore you..
you are beautiful
and fine.
I fill my cup
with your true kindness
and could drink you up
for all time.


II


oh when you leave
I am in such sadness,
your heart
is dearly pure.
when I am with you
comes the contentment
and I am fulfilled.


2day's prompt ("fan letter")

Saturday, April 2, 2016

Day 02: Type 1


Cupcakes
My brothers and myself.. Bob on the left, and Craig on the right.. one of my favorite photos of the three of us..

Type 1

"A trail of crumbs
in the garage
and on the bathroom sink.."
not from me but you.
"Where would I get the money
for "Suzy Qs"
or Hostess Pies?"
I ask but am told..
you are full of lies.
No one knows, but you,
and why should I blame
a big brother
sneaking treats..
regardless that
these feats mean death;
I used to envy you..
by the time the sickness comes
the evidence is long gone.
As for me, my lungs collapse,
the passages shrink
and like a fish out of water
I gasp, I grasp, and choke.
Asthma is no joke.
Kids like sweets;
and always found out.





today's prompt something about family.. this one about my brother Bob who passed March 2011..

Friday, April 1, 2016

Day 01: Ambivalence


Coastal Trail footbridge

ambivalence

looking forward, but
feeling sad.
wanting; not to lose..




NaPoWriMo: 30 days, 30 poems. Fortunately we're easing into it: above was my attempt at a lune, (today's prompt)